R-O-O-T-S, Species of Moss Uncovered OR History, Cause and Effect

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Today's poem first appeared on the blog in 2012.

Many of us are fascinated by our family history, and have been very frustrated by the closure of research libraries and archives due to the Covid-19 coronavirus pandemic.

Our predecessors carry the secrets of our genes which, in turn, help to shape who we are and what we make of our lives; a posthumous consciousness to which I often refer in my poems. Hopefully, more will be opening up as C-16 restrictions are gradually lifted ... so long as a second wave doesn't hit sooner rather than later.

Fingers (and toes) crossed; crossed, too for the re-opening of public libraries, of course.

But, oh, to be on the family history trail...!

This poem is a villanelle.

R-O-O-T-S, SPECIES OF MOSS UNCOVERED or HISTORY, CAUSE AND EFFECT

Challenging history,

moss on graveyard stone defies

what we call, identity

Traits of a personality

but a strategy ancestors devise,

challenging history

Shades of mystery

conspiring to spring surprise;

what we call, identity

A cliff-hanging story

of hope and glory, love and lies

challenging history

An affinity with mortality

drawn from family archives;

what we call, identity

A feeling for eternity,

whatever its ends may comprise;

challenging history,

what we call, identity

[From: On the Battlefields of Love by R. N. Taber, Assembly Books, 2010]

Know your Enemy

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

This poem is from my gay-interest blog archives from November 1913.

Political correctness is a good thing in many ways, but can be such a pain sometimes, responsible as it is for many people being afraid to say what they really think; in public, anyway. For example, I would rather know if someone is homophobic or how am I to know he or she is an enemy?  More importantly, how am I supposed to know, unless people are honest with me, that I need to encourage them to develop a more human, positive, responsible attitude towards gay people?  The chances are, they are still very hung up on outdated, misleading and invariably offensive stereotypes.

Gay or straight, there is a lot to be said for making a friend of an enemy; it has to be the best Public Relations ever gets on any field of play.  Ah, yes, but you have to know your enemy first.

Tragically, for many gay people around the world, it is (still) only too clear who the enemy is.

KNOW YOUR ENEMY 

Some people say there can be no safe haven

for gay men and women in a place (or metaphor)

they think of as ‘Heaven’

Some people say no God would ever tolerate

the kind of so-called ‘sin’ perpetrated by the likes  

of gay men and women

Some people say Holy Books are a measure

of spirituality compensating for any open-minded

take on homosexuality

So who are they that so love to pit humankind

against its own on the grounds of this socio-culture

or that religion?

So who are they who rail against those gay men

and women who are but as we are, and by nature’s

rule not ours?

So who are they who say they side with doves

of peace, and then go to war with such honourable

intentions?

Let them speak who claim to know how God

will have his way with men and women who happen

to be gay

Let them speak who would rail against those

of us who are gay, and don’t let political correctness

win the day

Let them speak who say gays cannot be forgiven

for, oh, such a sin on the grounds of this socio-culture

or that religion

No matter who or where, all humankind deserves

a voice, gay folks too, each of us gifted with a feeling

for freedom

Copyright R. N. Taber 2010; 2011

Telling it Straight

http://www.youtube.com/user/rogerNtaber

This poem can be found in  my gay-interest poetry blog archives for December 2012.

I will not be posting poems from any blog archives after today, but visitors are welcome to explore them on either or both blogs; archives go back ten years and are listed on the right hand side of any blog page. Meanwhile, I will continue to post new poems as and when I write them, but am giving priority to creating revised editions of my six poetry collections for readers to access online. This will take some time as I am very unwell these days although, as always, staying positive and looking on the bright side of life. Enjoy the archives, and if you know any poetry lovers feel feel free to recommend, everyone welcome.

I received an email some time ago - one of many - from the parent of a gay person who feels somehow 'to blame' for their being gay. In the sense that I believe sexuality is in the genes, I suppose this may be (very) loosely true. But gay people gave a choice. Most of us could live a 'straight' life if that's what we want for ourselves, and some do. Just because a man is gay, doesn't mean he can't have sex with a woman. Similarly, lesbians might prefer intimacy with other women, but that doesn't mean they can't have sex with a man.

Society - even these days - doesn't make the choice an easy one. Gay men and women may have to give other people time to get used to the idea, especially family and friends (unaware of the struggle going on within us) who may feel hurt that you hadn't confided in them sooner.

Despite positive legislation, being 'out' in the workplace can be just as tough, especially if you work with children and young people. So many misleading, outdated and offensive stereotypes continue to attach themselves to gay people, particularly gay men. We are not perverts and, for the record, paedophilia is not - nor has ever been - synonymous with homosexuality. Most gay people get on well with children and young people (possibly because they too know - only too well - the frustration of feeling misunderstood and/or patronised). Invariably there will be a few exceptions (aren't there to every rule?) that grab the attention of the media. So it is that stereotype continues to be piled on stereotype...

Blame implies guilt. Gay people have nothing to feel guilty about. Nor have their parents.

Guilt is a destructive force. Once it strikes, you have battles royal on your hands. You win some, you lose some. The important thing is to focus on winning the war. I lost one major battle many years ago and it led to a nervous breakdown. But I survived. Moreover, in doing so, I learned a lot about human nature, including my own.

There are a LOT of GOOD people in the world ready to believe the better of people, not the worst. True, I still suffer from depression. But people had faith in me at a time when I had none in myself. I cannot let them down.

One of the reasons for my breakdown was that I had not confronted my sexuality head-on. Oh, I had gone around the mulberry bush a few times and been in and out of the closet like a jack-in-a-box. But you cannot make a choice about something unless you face up to it and explore the implications. It was a long, hard process. I like to think I have come through it a better person. Certainly, I discovered a sense of spirituality that religion never gave me. This, too, helps me rise above depression and get on with my life…not as gay person, but as a person who just happens to be gay. No excuses, and none needed. No one to blame, it's a fact of life. Gay people aren't perfect, but who is?

TELLING IT STRAIGHT 

They told me being gay I would regret,

that I should take the conventional road

so family, friends, and people I met

wouldn’t be offended or get tongue-tied

The onus was on me to realise

an obligation to society,

rendering to Caesar what is Caesar’s

rather than courting impropriety

Having listened to all they had to say

and seen how some straight people carry on,

I beg to differ - it’s not being gay

that’s letting, dragging society down

Among the world’s worst and saddest vices,

something said about stones and glasshouses

[From: A Feeling for the Quickness of Time by R. N. Taber, Assembly Books, 2005]

  

The Hunt: Metaphor for LGBT History

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

This post/poem is taken from the archives of my gay-interest blog for May 2017; a gay-friendly straight friend whose cousin is gay and has been recently hospitalised following a nasty homophobic attack asked me to post it here today.

I have always thought hunting with hounds is a sick sport. Maybe that’s because I have a tried and tested empathy with any animal on the run; having been the victim of homophobic attacks in the distant past, I know how it feels. Some of us would get away by the skin of our teeth, of course, as I (usually) did, but not everyone escapes uninjured (or worse) and the trauma may well haunt a person all their life.

In some parts of the world (countries like Uganda and Iran, for example, to name just two) gay people have to hide their sexuality, yet are often sniffed out by bigoted forces and don't live to tell the tale. It is a tragedy that shames the civilised world. Sadly, it is as all too common a tragedy for unprotected species in the animal world as for gay people living in an intrinsically homophobic environment...or anyone else seen as fair game by those who choose to interpret this or that socio-cultural-religious take on life as justification for the unjustifiable.

[Hunters] take unbelievable pleasure in the hideous blast of the hunting horn and baying of the hounds… Erasmus (1466 - 1536)


THE HUNT, METAPHOR FOR LGBT HISTORY

I hear a horn,
the baying of hounds,
thundering hooves,
need to run and hide
if only I can

Closing in on me,
horn, hounds, hooves;
scarier still,
a stench of humans
laughing

I need to pause
but the only rest for me
will last forever
once laughter catches
up with me

My legs fail,
drag me to a sanctuary
of friendly bushes
but the frothing pack
sniffs me out

The lead hound
pauses, poised to leap
for my throat,
now strikes, and all
I hear is laughter

Copyright R. N. Taber 2011

Wannabe Hero or the Real Thing?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

A 'regular' blog reader has contacted me via the the Comments Box to ask that I repeat the link to an interview I gave about my poetry to a postgraduate student of multi-media journalism who emailed to ask if I would mind being the subject of a project. Benjamin Richter, a very talented young man, and I have his permission to post the link on my blog. As the blog reader did not give an e-mail address, I am posting it here in the hope that he or she will read today's post. You may need to copy the link into your browser to access:

https://r224e31251.racontr.com/index.html

We all have our own take on dreams, psychiatrists not the least. Many if not most of us like to think of ourselves as - subconsciously at least -  painters of our own dreams rather than simply subjected to whatever some proverbial Sandman happens to dish us. Some years ago, someone put to me that the greater part of what we know as wakefulness is but a dream, and the greater part of what we call sleep, a living nightmare. An interesting hypothesis, I thought at the time, and wondered how we would be expected to tell to which mind-body and spirit truly belongs...?

I guess it's much as my old English Teacher, 'Jock' Rankin used to say, "You can set your mind to anything if you try, Taber, but don't always expect to succeed, and never forget there is always a  price to pay one way or another."

For the record, I am still trying...

WANNABE HERO OR THE REAL THING?

I've painted pictures
only I will ever get to see,
an alternative reality
to the world surrounding me,
confounding me, creating
an alternative persona to one 
I am meant to be

I have lived in pictures
where only I will ever go,
a surrealist panorama
of the world surrounding me,
confounding me,
creating the kind of person
I 'm not meant to be

Ah, but in every picture
I'll never (really) get to see
a vibrant wood
for a heavily painted tree
or sail an ocean
for expecting its every wave 
to answer to me

I might even mistake
cloud shapes for skylarks,
even missing out 
on nature's other songs 
for starry heavens 
inviting a poet's (wry) take
on life and death

There are no people
in my pictures, smiling,
waving, kissing...
only ghosts, ever gesturing
loss, regret, and pain,
daring me to make the best 
of a sorry world

I archive the pictures
only I will ever get to see
an alternative reality
to all that's surrounding us,
(still) confounding us,
making of us what we will,
we sleepwalkers

Though the memory
exhibit visions of the mind,
imaging what lies
behind the world's chaos
and our confusion,
let's not mistake art for life,
risk missing out

Copyright R. N. Taber 2015