Disturbing the Peace

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

A reader comments that he has been very lonely during this second UK lockdown, and has coped far worse than during the first. I suspect this is true of many people, especially those of us who live alone and. or are unable to get out and about too well due to mobility problems. All we can do is keep looking on the brighter side of life, take each day as comes and trust that the vaccination program will see and end to all safety restrictions sooner rather than later. Even so, it is hard to nurture a positive mindset here in the UK when a third wave of Covid-19 is sweeping the continent. 

Many people are experiencing a range of emotions with which they are unfamiliar, not the least of which is fear. Several readers have emailed to say they feel scared as soon as they wake up each morning, dread having to face another day of having t cope with the Covid stress that is taking its toll on everyone. “The worst thing is,” a reader confides, “…is that I cannot tell anyone I am so scared as I’d feel such a fool.” Believe me, most people would be only too happy to have an excuse to share e the very same feelings. 

There is an old saying that a trouble shared is a trouble halved; fear is no exception. 

Having grown up the very homophobic 1950’s, I was afraid to tell people – especially family – that I am gay. Had I been able to share my fears with someone would have made a huge difference. As it was, my family were content to discuss the likelihood that I was gay, but no one thought to bring the subject into the open and talk to me about it until untold damage had already been done. When I finally came out to the world as a gay man, it was an indescribable relief. 

As I have said before, on both poetry blogs, I feel encouraged on behalf of young LGBT people these days that fewer are likely to be treated like freaks of nature - or 'sinners' as various world religions would have it - simply for the nature of their sexuality. 

Sadly, human nature being the complex organism it is, certain societies and communities worldwide still have a lot to learn - and become reconciled to - as far as same sex lovers and human rights are concerned. Hopefully, the pandemic will at least have brought home to many if not most that, for all our differences, we are (all) but human.

DISTURBING THE PEACE

Unwelcome visitor,
anytime, anywhere, day or night,
I may well depart
without even giving my name 
if only to be sure
you will know it when I call again,
mind-body-spirit
(always one for a game of chance)
offering suggestions at every blind turn
inciting desperation 

Deny me if you will,
I’ll not be deterred from haunting
and hurting you,
making you regret whatever it is
you would hide,
though there’s no sure hiding place,
the only solution,
head-on confrontation (always your call)
winner risking all… 

I haunt all creatures
great and small, but it is humankind
I most love to taunt
with unspoken threats the heart
hears only too well,
but would prefer to ignore, finds hard
to share or explain
lest it be caught out, made to give a name
to some guilt or shame 

I am Fear, last heard of breaking down doors
kept shut for years

Copyright R. N. Taber 2021