The Leaf

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

“In every change, in every falling leaf there is some pain, some beauty. And that's the way new leaves grow. - Amit Ray

“Storms make the oak grow deeper roots” – George Herbert

“Birth, life, and death - each took place on the hidden side of a leaf.” - Toni Morrison

Not a day passes when I am left wondering if I have another poem in me.  Yet, only a few days ago, I found myself observing a an oak tree leaf, left discoloured by a sustained heatwave, resisting a sudden breeze until finally in full flight from its host tree, dancing freely above my head. Moments later, a heavy shower brought it down and left it fluttering on a bed of dry grass but a few feet away. 

"A metaphor for us all there?" I wondered, as my thought processes began the task of assembling a poem...

THE LEAF

Sad leaf, shades of green,
yellow and brown,
grown weary of resisting
a fun, lively breeze,
employing summer’s wiles
to have it break free 
of host tree and season,
birdsong, a plea  to Earth Mother
to see it true to its nature

Oak, hungry for nurture,
no less thirsting
for rainfall than generations
of kith and kin,
budding flowers and fauna, 
keeping it company
in (far) better times and worse,
trusting Earth Mother to listen well,
as deserves heart-and-soul

Sad leaf, making its bid
for freedom,
persuaded by the breeze
to explore its time
and space within minutes
of welcome shower's
waking flowers and fauna
to a finer well-being, a light rainfall 
reworking heart-and-soul

Leaf’s delight in sailing
on the breeze
sadly, but only short-lived,
wind easing, raindrops 
forcing it to face home truths,
all kith and kin 
left weeping as it lay dying, 
regretting its having finally caved in
to the thrill of temptation?

Dead leaf, oft recalled by kith and kin
to any who care to listen...

Copyright R. N. Taber, 2022

[Note: If you enjoy dipping into the blog from time to time, do tell  any others whom you think may also  enjoy some of my poems.  Thanks for dropping by today, much appreciated.] RT

My World

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

"I am in blood/Stepped in so far, that should I wade no more,/ Returning would be a tedious as go o'er." - thus speaks Macbeth in Shakespeare's play.

"Confessions may be good for the soul, but they are bad for reputations." - Thomas Dewar

Now, an old friend once confided that he wished he had lived his life differently, done certain things differently, made fewer mistakes. He then gave a long sigh and said, "We are who we are, I guess, and who can we blame for that but ourselves? Others play their part, no doubt about that, but at the end of the day..." I have to say I empathised completely.

Much as I deplore Vladimir Putin's intentions against Ukraine, I cannot help but wonder whether or not he, too, empathises with Macbeth?  To some extent or another, I suspect many, if not most, of us can?

As my English teacher pointed out at the time my class was studying the play, we all make many a mistake where even apologising and trying to make amends means precious little, in real terms, to those on the receiving end. 

Whether 'stepped in blood so far...' or no, it's not so much vanity that often prevents us from attempting a retreat, as fear of experiencing physical and/ or emotional consequences not dissimilar to whose we have inflicted.

As my mother would say, nothing ventured, nothing gained...except consequences.

MY WORLD

I had left without going anywhere,
done damage without lifting a finger,
enough to have said things
I could not, would not ever take back
for lack of moral courage
in me, refusing, time and again to confess
that of the you-me-us
to whom I have always aspired, the ‘me’
 is but a fantasy

I was never the person I believed in,
whom others took for someone born to be
a loser in the greater scheme
of humanity, letting them down by putting
a false smile on my face,
for making out all’s well in a world waking
to nightmares. day after day,
small comfort in sweet dreams every night
of getting it right

Too late to go back, set out again,
driven by broader, kinder, fairer objectives
towards those with whom
I cannot agree to differ without losing face,
not an option for the likes
of such as I, raised to believe it’s better to go
on the attack than wait
for the long arm of diplomacy to reach out
too late...

Precious little peace in a world so mindful of me,
my own worst enemy

Copyright R. N. Taber 2022

From rhetoric to...what, Exactly?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

"Never think that war, no matter how necessary nor how justified, is not a crime." – Ernest Hemingway

: "War does not determine who is right, only who is left." - Winston Churchill

As ordered by President Vladimir Putin, Ukraine is now under full-scale attack by Russian forces..

While the hearts of those of us fortunate enough be living in a relatively free society reach out to the ordinary man and women on both sides of the escalating conflict, we can but wait with baited breath for the final outcome, and how it will affect the rest of the world.

Many of us are wondering just how far they will go, those world leaders who have voiced support for Ukraine and condemned Putin; in terms of military support, for example, as opposed to fine rhetoric...?

Potentially, we are looking a third world war in the face. Let us hope not, for the implications of that in the 21^st Century are unthinkable. Hopefully, even Vladimir Putin has more common sense than to envisage taking on the entire Western Alliance? Or does he know something, we don’t...?

Meanwhile, we can but do our best to nurture a positive-thinking mindset and trust that sanity, if not peace, will prevail in our time among its powers that be...

FROM RHETORIC TO.... WHAT, EXACTLY?

I tell people what they want to hear,
take a lead, as powers that be are expected to do,
whether or not election speeches
are full of half-truths meant to muster support
or I simply impose an impression
that any collective mind-body-spirit dare not resist,
such persuasive powers of rhetoric
and gesture as incite following me to the ends of the earth,
no matter injury or death

I urge people to take such pride in me
and in themselves that reservations are swept aside
by a rising tide of reassurance
that God is on the side of Human Rights, has us
in His sights, will bring the world
to see our point of view, make heroes of you-me-us;
whatever history may make of it all,
we will yet justify our actions on a universal scale, reconcile
with its very heart and soul

Ah, but there are flaws in every argument,
to be discerned and expressed by word and/or deed,
or simply ignored by any who much prefer
to turn a deaf ear and blind eye to potential risks
involved regarding family and friends,
nor any less to the mind-body-spirit we claim our own,
in denial of the fact that none of us
stands alone and what affects one affects all, one way or another,
can but redefine our future

Whatever, at least credit me with boosting
a flagging economy, given the manufacture and sales
or various weaponry soaring, anxious
as I am to be seen scoring points over any adversary
daring to take issue with me, expose
such powers that be taking my side and promoting
my intentions, no hint of self-interest,
only desires enough to stoke the fires of Hell until an end in sight,
victory or shameless defeat

I am much the same war cry as preying on humanity’s worst fears
for home and country... across centuries 

Copyright R. N. Taber, 2022

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  

Mind-Body-Spirit, Subject to Time and Consequence(s)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

A wise woman, my mother. She died 25+ years ago, but I probably listen n to her more now than I ever did. I could be a naughty child (who isn’t?) at which times she would teach as well as scold. She once pointed out that almost everything we say has consequences, for better or worse, for ourselves and/or others; the latter, especially, we may never be made aware of... 

All the more reason, I eventually understood, to think before we do something, or don’t do it as the case may be... 

Easier said than done, of course, yours truly no less guilty than anyone else of forgetting to look before we leap and risk feeding this or that cliché its potential for truism. 

MIND-BODY-SPIRIT, SUBJECT TO TIME AND CONSEQUENCE(S) 

Surely, the tide,
as surely life’s sweet dreams saving us
from ourselves and each other for offering
alternatives? 

I see your face
in a brave moon, straining to shine on,
but in vain as needs must it, too, take its cue
from Apollo

 Surely, the tide,
as surely as high hopes of fame, fortune
superseded by life-images of lovers kept busy
building bridge 

They laughed us
off the planet, yet we’d take it on the chin,
find a white horse to help us find our way back,
time and again 

We rode to hell
and back, you and I, joining Earth Mother
in races against the clock, win some, lose some,
no going back 

Yes, we fell prey
to a collective giving, taking, having to settle
for less than we bargained for, our personal space
a saving grace 

Now, a sure tide’s
surfing me still (always will), moving me on
to that one-and-only shore proving longer than life
for being loved

 Copyright R. N. Taber 2021 

[NB: This poem has its origins in an earlier poem, Surfing, that appears in my first collection, Love and Human Remains, Assembly Books, 2000 (see also Gay blog, March, 2011); it had already appeared in several poetry journals and worked well enough at the time, but 20+ years on, subsequent changes in form and content defy my referring to it as simply a revision.] RNT

Democracy, the Dark Side

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Update (Oct 14. 2017): I have always believed that Brexit will be good for Britain, but never more so than now as EU leaders procrastinates while blaming the UK for negotiations not progressing as well as they might.  It is clear to many of us that they are afraid the UK just might be on the right road by exiting what is seeming more and more like and organisation unfit for purpose; a great idea in principle, but proving less and less so in practise. If we make a go of Brexit, as I am sure we will in time, the fear is that other countries may follow, especially given the fact that there is increasing unrest and dissatisfaction in other countries whose leaders seem determined to turn a deaf ear; Italy, Greece and Germany to name but three; nor is Freedom of Movement without due border checks in an Age of Terrorism the only issue. Even in the USA, Land of the Free, Congress continues to turn an all but deaf ear to growing demands for at least an appropriate/ common sense amendment to the law relating to a right to bear arms more relevant to the Age of the Pioneer than the modern world.] 

Update (Nov 03, 2015): It would appear that Democracy has just died. The High Court has ruled that Article 50 cannot be invoked without Parliament's approval. Hopefully, the Supreme Court may yet overturn this judgement. A democratic principle is at stake here. Why bother to ask the people what they want if they are going to be ignored? (It was a very high turnout for the referendum.)

My only regret about voting to leave the European Union is leaving myself open to abuse from narrow-minded, arrogant hypocrites who, on the one hand support Human Rights, and on the other have no respect for the rights of every individual to make up their own minds on matters that have a direct bearing on their lives and the lives of family and friends. Whatever happened to the right to disagree?

I resent being called a racist because I voted to leave the E U. Immigration was not the only issue on the political agenda. Besides, most people were voting against a flawed system of immigration over which we had precious little real control while under the thumb of the Brussels parliament. Many people of various ethnic origins who have been living and working here for years are also sick of the political shambles that passes for a European Union. [Yes, of course, EU nationals living and working here should be allowed to stay, not least because they are friends and neighbours, but what is our new PM supposed to say if any among the EU elite try to use Brits living there as bargaining chips during the course of Brexit  negotiations? Let’s face it. It would come as no surprise to anyone should they stoop to such tactics.]

Among a UK majority, I voted for an EEC (European Economic Community) not a United States of Europe.

Some of my friends voted to remain in the European Union and we have hotly debated the issue. However, we all agreed from the start to respect each other’s points of view (despite trying to change it) and - perhaps even more importantly - that we would not let our diverse opinions undermine our friendship. In short, we agreed to accept a majority vote if only because we all support the principles of democracy. Those people crying ‘Foul’ because the vote did not go their way are ignorant scumbags; no less so are those making the vote an excuse to verbally and/or physically abuse ‘foreigners’ living and working in the UK, some of them for years. Those who are calling the vote a disgrace need to look closely at the worse aspects of its aftermath if not their role in it.

No one likes a bad loser. I suspect the vocal albeit significant minority now noisily deploring the E U referendum result by casting aspersions on the opposition, even calling our integrity into question, will find that out for themselves in the fullness of time. Meanwhile, the country needs to pull together and unite not let knee-jerk reactions and activists prevent the UK's future outside the EU taking a positive turn in the longer if not shorter term.

This poem is, yes, another villanelle.

DEMOCRACY, THE DARK SIDE

Come a vote on this or that decision
(why not let us all have a say?)
cue for bad losers to abuse someone

Some losers will wallow in delusion
(pity any scapegoats in their way)
come a vote on this or that decision

Vanity of vanities, the grand illusion
(in the right, deserve to win the day)
cue for bad losers to abuse someone

No assuming immunity to aspersion
(or sitting on the damn fence today)
come a vote on this or that decision

Take the case for a European Union
(grave reservations come what may)
cue for bad losers to abuse someone

Consensus is no call for celebration
(democracy, too, must feel its way);
come a vote on this or that decision,
cue for bad losers to abuse someone

Copyright R. N. Taber 2016

L-I-F-E, a Compendium of Mind Games

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

As I grow old, I am reminded how true it is what they say about recalling times past more graphically than the day before. Some of my memories are peopled with family, old friends, lovers and colleagues, even those I only ever knew as friendly faces with whom to pass a pleasant evening at a local bar after a long day of getting nowhere fast.

I do not summon these ghosts, rather vice versa, as if to heap me with regret and/or unanswerable questions as to why we no longer see each other. Did we simply drift apart or was there never any question of our staying in touch anyway? In the latter case, why should I recall them at all? What is it about certain people that they leave such a lasting impression on us? I suspect it tells us less about them than about ourselves if we care to probe further which is perhaps why we rarely do…in case we don’t like some of the answers we may come up with?

A prevailing image of memory I have is of two cruise liners; one, carrying us along with those who have truly meant something to us in life (for good or ill) and another carrying those we recall for reasons we cannot or prefer not to articulate. So they - and we - journey across time and space, passing each other from time to time like ships in the night, each with its ‘live’ cargo of assorted shadows.

L-I-F-E, A COMPENDIUM OF MIND GAMES

As I walked into a crowded room,

everyone stopped talking,

stared at me as if I were a stranger

and had no right to be there,

an uninvited guest, gatecrasher, someone

sure to disturb their peace

I approached someone I once knew

to kick-start a conversation,

cue for everyone to start blowing

pretty bubbles of words

that hit the ceiling, burst, spilling questions

on each and every one of us

‘Tell me, how are things in your world

since last we got together?

Why must Time so hoard its past

as if it were a collector 
gathering evidence to prove a point,

as if world history 
isn’t always reminding us of our hits, 
near misses, successes

and failures, kindly meant interference

in other people’s affairs 
as likely to end in tears as assumptions 
that not even the best laid plans 
of mice and men are as guaranteed to see 
the cold light of day as any tall tales that come
and go like furniture and fittings

Silences tickling my ears, like no-answers

to a single question dripping me

like raindrops, leaving puddles in my wake

as I negotiate paths opening up

to let me pass, courtesy of people I’d loved,

let slip away or simply forgotten

No welcome hugs, kisses on each cheek,

only looks probing my thoughts

from bubble faces soaking me in memories,

half memories, pretend memories

for all I know, pulling at lesser heartstrings,

sleepwalking me into other selves

Copyright R. N. Taber 2016

Earmarked for Development

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Several readers have asked when I intend to record more of my poems for You Tube. Well, soon I hope. However, Graham, my close friend and cameraman works full-time so is not often available and I have been unable to get anyone else interested.

For those of you who may be interested but haven’t yet seen and heard my capers on You Tube,

try: http://www.youtube.com/rogerNtaber  or keyword ‘Roger Taber You Tube’

We only do it for fun (and that includes heading straight for the nearest pub afterwards) but hopefully people will enjoy our efforts. I will be posting more on You Tube throughout the year, weather and cameraman availability permitting.

Meanwhile...

The world's growing population requires that we provide for its housing and other needs. We should not forget, though, that nature provides not only for its own protection but ours too. Our taking from nature without giving back is already making itself menacingly felt in various ways, and will likely haunt future generations with even greater menace. Deforestation especially, leaves us all exposed to climate change,

EARMARKED FOR DEVELOPMENT 

Archived, children at play

where once were trees and grass;

echoes of sunny laughter
but splinters of broken glass

Carefree voices, last heard
drifting away like autumn leaves;
carbuncles springing up
where Earth Mother grieves

Manna for the developers,

demand ever outstripping supply;

grass all concreted over,
(a time to live, a time to die?)

Nobody left likely to recall
how things were once-upon-a-tree
come nature, fairy tale...
Carbuncles, the new poetry

Copyright R. N. Taber 2004; 2016

[Note: An earlier version of this poem appears in The Third Eye by R. N. Taber, Assembly Books, 2004; rev. ed. in e-format in preparation.]

Through a Glass Darkly

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

An earlier version of this poem as first published in the anthology An Immortal Truth, Poetry Now [Forward Press] 2000 and subsequently in my first collection the following year.

The original version was written in 1984 following a discussion with several peers about how awful we were sometimes when we were children and how, whenever we look in memory’s mirror for those halcyon days, maturity invariably summons certain regrets that, in turn, cause cracks to appear...

To see “through a glass” (mirror) darkly” is to have an obscure or imperfect vision of reality. The expression is often presumed to have come from the writings of Paul, the Apostle who suggests that while we may not see clearly in the Here-and-Now, we will do so at the end of time. 

Alternatively: "For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known." Corinthians Chap 13 verse 12 (I know my Bible, it is a good read, even though I had rejected religion for nature by the age of 11 years.)

Whatever, many if not most children, may well know right from wrong, but lack the experience maturity brings to imagine the broader consequences of either. Ahm yes, but how many of us have the imagination to ever really understand the wider consequences of our actions ...? 

There is a lot to be said for the old adages, two that instantly spring to mind are 'Look before you leap.' and 'A little thought goes a long way.'

THROUGH A GLASS DARKLY 

In a pretty side street, tree lined,
its children playing hide-and-seek
make plenty din enough
to wake the dead, the old man says
who lives on the ground floor
of an end house whose shiny steps
such fun we slip, towering wall
a thrill to squeal and climb, knowing
yell and fuss, but by the time he’ll rush,
no sign of us

Waving a stick, he’ll bawl us out
and we’ll mouth him back, but not until
the door slams shut. Oh, but kids
at play make no excuses, just din enough
to wake the dead, the old man says,
treading the ground floor of the end house
whose mossy steps so snug we sprawl,
graffiti wall a joy to lean, grubby curtains
a-quiver at our kissing or could it be for all
he’s missing...?

Children gone, traffic enough
to wake the dead, the old man said
who lived that shabby room
whose crabby gloom we never spared;
brave wall, a sorry spread,
no curtains (windows boarded up instead)
ghosts playing hide-and-seek
with eternity facing a bleak affinity
for wings circling the last tree left standing,
cracks in a mirror appearing

 Uncomfortable truths, a cruelty enduring

Copyright R. N. Taber 2000; 2011