L-I-F-E, a Compendium of Mind Games
As
I grow old, I am reminded how true it is what they say about recalling times
past more graphically than the day before. Some of my memories are peopled with
family, old friends, lovers and colleagues, even those I only ever knew as
friendly faces with whom to pass a pleasant evening at a local bar after a long
day of getting nowhere fast.
I
do not summon these ghosts, rather vice versa, as if to heap me with regret
and/or unanswerable questions as to why we no longer see each other. Did we
simply drift apart or was there never any question of our staying in touch
anyway? In the latter case, why should I recall them at all? What is it about
certain people that they leave such a lasting impression on us? I suspect it
tells us less about them than about ourselves if we care to probe further which
is perhaps why we rarely do…in case we don’t like some of the answers we may
come up with?
A
prevailing image of memory I have is of two cruise liners; one, carrying us
along with those who have truly meant something to us in life (for good or ill)
and another carrying those we recall for reasons we cannot or prefer not to
articulate. So they - and we - journey across time and space, passing each
other from time to time like ships in the night, each with its ‘live’ cargo of
assorted shadows.
L-I-F-E, A COMPENDIUM OF MIND GAMES
As
I walked into a crowded room,
everyone
stopped talking,
stared
at me as if I were a stranger
and
had no right to be there,
an
uninvited guest, gatecrasher, someone
sure
to disturb their peace
I
approached someone I once knew
to
kick-start a conversation,
cue
for everyone to start blowing
pretty
bubbles of words
that
hit the ceiling, burst, spilling questions
on
each and every one of us
‘Tell
me, how are things in your world
since
last we got together?
Why
must Time so hoard its past
as
if it were a collector
gathering evidence to prove a point,
gathering evidence to prove a point,
as
if world history
isn’t always reminding us of our hits,
near misses, successes
isn’t always reminding us of our hits,
near misses, successes
and
failures, kindly meant interference
in
other people’s affairs
as likely to end in tears as assumptions
that not even the best laid plans
of mice and men are as guaranteed to see
the cold light of day as any tall tales that come
and go like furniture and fittings
as likely to end in tears as assumptions
that not even the best laid plans
of mice and men are as guaranteed to see
the cold light of day as any tall tales that come
and go like furniture and fittings
Silences
tickling my ears, like no-answers
to
a single question dripping me
like
raindrops, leaving puddles in my wake
as
I negotiate paths opening up
to
let me pass, courtesy of people I’d loved,
let
slip away or simply forgotten
No
welcome hugs, kisses on each cheek,
only
looks probing my thoughts
from
bubble faces soaking me in memories,
half
memories, pretend memories
for
all I know, pulling at lesser heartstrings,
sleepwalking
me into other selves
Copyright R. N.
Taber 2016
Labels: achievement mind games, consequences, failure, ghosts, human nature, human spirit, life forces, memories, mistakes, personal best, personal space, poetry, positive thinking, regrets, self-awareness, success, survival
posted by R. N. Taber | 08:17
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