The Old Curiosity Shop (and Slumping)
From Roger’s friend, Graham
Browsing Roger’s blog postings offers interesting snapshots
through time. A shop of curiosities decked with gems formed in deep poetic musings, tattered postcards of conflicts and whimsical ephemera. Playthings of the imagination, broken
artifacts of childhood and sketches of zeitgeists vanished. Garlands of dried flowers
from summers past and evocations of smiling snowmen long melted. His inner eye
ever seeking out that glimmer of fascination in grey streets and overcast skies.
His beautiful soul always aspiring for a kinder, gentler world united by love
and not divided by oceans of tears.
I must admit that I’ve never met anyone like him before or
since. Such friendship is a treasure beyond riches. With the pressures and distractions
of life it’s easily to lose sight of that. Certainly it comes as an overwhelming
realization with the wound of loss. Healed by time, true enough, but some injuries
feel deep-rooted with a dull ache resonating through months and years. I’m sad that
I’m not able to call Roger today to compare notes on life’s ups and downs, make
each other laugh and take off into wild flights of fancy. Just here,
earthbound; trying to motivate myself…
It’s raining lightly here in Essex on a Sunday morning. Quiet
with just the patter of rain and faint drone of distant traffic. A gaussian grey
veil masks the sun. Smudges of blue tease with notions of fairer weather. The wide
bow of the Thames estuary that I overlook reflects the sky like a dusty mirror.
Sluggish and lazy. Even the raucous black-headed gulls seem muted, pensive.
I’m fortunate that I don’t have to work on Sundays. I’ll
feed the birds shortly. (You’re never truly alone among avian friends.) And then a
riverside jog to restore flagging spirits and vitality. I’ll prepare a vegan
roast dinner, laze for a bit, and dive into the raging torrent of work emails! (This
mitigates the horror of my inbox at the start of a working week.) Finally, some
indulgent escapism with a movie and some un-milked chocolate.
I’ll leave you with a poem which I hope captures
Roger’s enduring rallying cry to ‘rise
above!’. Thanks so much for reading. Please feel free to dip in to Roger’s blog
and trust to serendipity whenever curiosity overtakes you…
* *
*
‘Heaven knows we need never be ashamed of our tears, for
they are rain upon the blinding dust of earth, overlying our hard hearts.’ Charles Dickens (Great Expectations)
‘The most important thing in life is to stop saying, ‘I
wish’ and start saying, ‘I will’. Consider nothing impossible, then treat
possibilities as probabilities.’ Charles
Dickens (David Copperfield)
* *
*
SLUMP or
(ALMOST) IN FREEFALL…
Slump in a
chair, thinking about life
and all the people I’ve known,
wondering where have they
gone?
Slump in a
chair, thinking about life
and all the things I have
done,
wondering where I went wrong?
Slump in a
chair, thinking about life
and choices made from the
heart,
wondering where fear played a
part?
Slump in a
chair, thinking about life
and lovers who promised to
stay
but left within hours of a
night or day
Slump in a
chair, thinking about life
and all the years wasted on
regret
where I should have stood up
to fate
Slump in a
chair, thinking about life
and every epiphany I’ve known,
wondering where did I go so
wrong?
Slump in a
chair, thinking about life
and growing older, weaker,
for knowing I could have done
better
Slump in a
chair, thinking about death,
and all the people I’ve known,
wondering if there’s a hell or
heaven?
Slump in a
chair, watching television,
soaking up soap opera friends,
lost the plot, left wondering
how it ends
Slump in a
chair, fret about being alone?
Not this time (slam on the
brakes);
will get my life back,
whatever it takes
Copyright R N. Taber 2008
Labels: bereavement, birds, Charles Dickens, curiosity, Essex, lazy, meanderings, motivation, reflections, retrospective, slump, slumping, uplifting