Monday, 1 September 2014

Ego in Denial

A loud, talkative businessman attached himself to me during an overnight stay at a hotel years ago, and offered me this advice over countless pints of lager: ‘In business, you have to aim high, be a real go-getter, stay focused on what you want and go for it, no matter what…or who. And shall I tell you what’s so great about life at the top, young man? It’s that you don’t need anyone, but everyone needs you. Believe me, there’s no feeling can match it...’

Regarding the latter point, I believed him although, needless to say, I was no more impressed then than I would be now, some 30+ years on.

This poem is a villanelle.


Don’t need anyone needing me,
the best way to get by;
(Loneliness, feeding on me….)

Voices cruelly, mockingly,
demanding, why…?
(Don’t need anyone needing me)

Choices, always goading me
to expose a white lie,
(loneliness, feeding on me…)

No one can stop me running free,
though a sandman try;
(Don’t need anyone needing me)

Scathing home truths would see
I get real, brave up, deny
loneliness feeding on me…

Love, it’s a life-and-death poetry
milking rhyme and reason dry;
(Don’t need anyone needing me)
Loneliness, feeding on me…

Copyright R. N. Taber 2005; 2014

[Note: First published as The Hungry Heart in A Feeling for the Quickness of Time by R. N. Taber, Assembly Books, 2005.]

No comments :