As Spring Rain to a Tree Rose

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber 

I was young when my grandfather died; it was my first close encounter with death - of which I was already fearful - and my mother tried to reassure me.

     “Life and death are two sides of the same experience,” she said, “People die, but our memories of them add a new dimension to our own lives. son in a way, they live on in us.”

      “Sort of like ghosts?” I asked

       “Sort of like ghosts,” she agreed.

With all this in mind, and understanding little of it, we visited the mortuary. Grandad looked very peaceful, as if he were but asleep. I have been afraid of dying since, although I prefer not to think about it. I have my favourite ghosts, yes, but I see them as an extension of my living self, not as dead people.

 Even so, the closer they are to us, the more intensely we miss them, and that is the greater shock to the human condition as I would discover when my mother died some years later. I may have understood something of death, but I had yet to learn how the grieving process can affect us in different ways. Like most of us, though, I eventually emerged from the grieving process in one piece, if not unscathed.

Significantly, I could not cry when my mother dies, the tears would come several  years later in the course of a nervous breakdown.

As regular readers know, I am not a religious person in the sense that I do not subscribe to any of the world religions but think of myself as a pantheist. No religion  has a monopoly on spirituality, though, and it is to the spiritual nature of death that I can relate, closely enough to bring me not only comfort whenever I need it most, but also such inspiration as drawn from of some of the more inspirational people I have ever known, dead or alive.

AS SPRING RAIN TO A TREE ROSE

Life-companion
to human mind-body-spirit,
I try to encourage
a positive response wherever
the landscape ahead
seems as bleak and forbidding
to the inner eye
as to every nuance of sensibility
at the heart of me  

Life-force,
even in the face of mortality,
able to offer respite
from pain and disillusionment
in such tears
as would fall like tree rose petals
in a light breeze
but for suffering the raging calm
before a storm 

Lifesaver,
bringing all mind-body-spirit
to a gentler vision,
one of such happiness and joy
as only nurture
such as spring rain to a tree rose, 
can engage inner eye
and hopeful heart to see it bloom
night and day 

I am Grief, bringer of such memories
as sure to hurt as inspire us 

Copyright R. N. Taber, 2021