Tuesday, 21 January 2014

Object of Obscure Desire OR Scapegoat...?

Now, I have to confess to occasional mood swings since I began my hormone therapy treatment for prostate cancer. Fortunately, my closest friends are very patient with me and are very supportive.

Funny, isn’t it, about some people? Family, friends, neighbours, work colleagues...Some rally round in a crisis and others run a mile. Not everyone appreciates that love, friendship or just being a good colleague involves teamwork even or perhaps especially when the team comprises of only two. 

Some people are not into a give-and-take scenario. They see something in someone they want and feel entitled - if only by association - to take, take, and take again. They have discovered an offload Channel, but not a two-way one. (Reciprocity is not in their vocabulary.) When it comes to giving something back, they don’t want to know since any relationship has to be on their terms or not at all. For the most part, they are not nasty people in the least (just being human?) and can be good company when life is running smoothly, but are too self-centred and self-absorbed to be anything but takers; being a giver requires too much effort, imposes on their personal space and makes unfair demands on their time. What we see is far less than what we get. (I remember thinking that once on a school visit to a waxworks museum.)


Reason not the need,’ cries King Lear in what is considered by many (including me) to be the greatest of Shakespeare’s plays.

It is true that need sets itself above reason in the sense that human nature rarely answers to logic. So when a follower of logic puts to a follower of religion, that he or she might explain what they mean by God, any reply is more likely to pertain to a personal  need than anything reason can attempt to rationalize. Oh, there will be references made to Holy Books and the usual get-out clause about Faith having less to do with reason than trust and/or divine inspiration, but that doesn’t really answer the question. 

As regular readers will know, it has long been my personal belief that religion has far more to do with a person’s need to believe in God than the existence of God as anything other than a metaphorical force behind all that is good in the world as opposed to all that is bad. That isn't to say, I don’t respect that need,. I do. Moreover, I can relate to it far more than I can relate to any personified God. I respect all Faiths, too, but can neither enter into any nor would want to because, for me, Belief is not enough. I need to ask questions and keep on asking questions until any answers I may find begin to make some kind of sense rather like pieces in a jigsaw.

You, me, us…we are all parts of the same jigsaw.

If a sense of spirituality inspires me to ask questions, I take it from nature, my mentor in such matters even in childhood where religion offered me nothing no matter what I was told to the contrary or how hard I looked.

This poem is a kenning.


I am the curator
of a waxworks museum
down your way
where people come to see
whatever it is they need
to see, smell, do a double-take
or relate or turn a travesty 
of humanity’s shortcomings
to their advantage

I am that object
of obscure desire haunting
darkest hours,
inspiring orgasm sublime
just for playing time
at its own game, letting its tides
take the blame,
any old scapegoat will do  
for its shortcomings

I am the creator
of that waxworks museum
down your way,
threatened by all creativity’s
burning desire
to expose this or that travesty
of humanity,
as good a scapegoat as any
for our shortcomings

Some call me God in Heaven,
who need me to fall back on

Copyright R. N. Taber 2011

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