A Poet's Blog: Roger N.Taber shares his thoughts & poems...

Thoughts and observations by English poet Roger N. Taber, a retired librarian and poet-novelist.- "Ethnicity, Religion, Gender, Sexuality ... these are but parts of a whole. It is the whole that counts." RNT [NB While I have no wish to create a social network, I will always reply to critical emails about my poetry. Contact: rogertab@aol.com].

Name:
Location: London, United Kingdom

Sadly, a bad fall in 2012 has left me with a mobility problem, and being diagnosed with prostate cancer the same year hasn't helped, but I get out and about with my trusty walking stick as much as I can, take each day as it comes and try to keep looking on the bright(er) side of life. Many of my poems reflect the need to nurture a positive-thinking mindset whatever life throws at us.

Tuesday 29 November 2011

Reaching for Raison d’être

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Christmas come but once a year, and I say thank goodness for that. No killjoy, me, but whenever its followers celebrate this religion or that, we have a sense of one Faith providing answers to our raison d’être over another. This, in turn, finds some people angry, others fearful, and others even further than ever along private paths littered with doubts and misgivings. The results, for even the most impassioned Believer can be a terrible sense of loneliness that even prayer cannot always assuage.

Many, if not most people like me, who no longer subscribe to any religion but put their faith in nature, are only touched by religious differences in so far as we would like to see more people of all persuasions - religious, political, sexual, whatever - better able to enter into other points of view than divided by them, more integrated if not unified. Even so, we are no more immune to feelings of doubt, fear and loneliness than anyone else. And (as in my case) being gay has nothing to do with it although it is very hurtful that the more zealous members of some religions seem bent on whipping up an all but hysterical hostility against gay people.

Whatever our colour, creed, sex or sexuality we can but find our own way through the maze of human emotions that, if we are honest, are more likely than not to undermine any spiritual convictions if only now and then.

A teacher once told my class - way back in the 1950's - that whatever else we did not learn in life, we should learn to care. I took little notice at the time, but his words have returned to haunt me time and time again, especially when I feel at my lowest ebb. Moreover, we are a common humanity, warts 'n' all, and I put it to you that it is also a lesson that various contemporary societies around the world would do well to learn, and learn before it is too late to matter.

REACHING FOR RAISON D’ETRE

Bells ringing, but not for me
so why should I care?
Snowmen smiling, but not at me
so why should I care?
Kids playing, but not with me
so why should I care?

People laughing, but not at me
so why should I care?
Robins singing, but not for me
so why should I care?
Some folks praying, but not for me
so why should I care?

Future generations relying on me
because I care;
nature’s vulnerability nagging at me
because I care;
religious differences preying on me
because I care

A feeling for peace and love in me
because I care;
an eye on the politics of change in me
because I care;
poetry of the human spirit, my reward
because I care

Copyright R. N. Taber 2011

Labels: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Tuesday 22 November 2011

A Short Essay On Children's Play OR Peter Pan Revisited

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

I am no die-hard capitalist by any stretch of the imagination, but the idea that a capitalist is related to the Bogey Man under a child’s bed is absurd. Raising that child and trying to give him or her best chances in life is a costly business. Capitalism plays no small part in making those chances available.

A former colleague commented only recently on a mutual friend who is doing well in the world of big business that it was an obvious career choice for him because, ‘Like all fat cats, he thinks with his wallet and has no imagination.’ Yes, well, there are exceptions to every sweeping statement, and in this case I happen to know better...

Children's play is SO important to personal development in our formative years; apart from the mental as well as physical value of exercise, it encourages us to form relationships, engage in teamwork, appreciate if not understand human nature better, make certain allowances wherever they  need to be made, agreeing to differ without falling out and discovering the art of reconciliation whenever we do...

Sadly, some if not many of us do not always carry lessons learned as children and young people into adult life.

A SHORT ESSAY ON CHILDREN'S PLAY or PETER PAN REVISITED

I chanced to glance from a window
at children playing in the street below;
their colourful antics took me back
to halcyon times of myth and magic;
I couldn’t resist opening the window,
setting sail on waves of wicked laughter
to a bay where cliffs of ivy trellis towered
above a stormy sea of long grass

The garden shed, a mighty galleon,
we handkerchief pirates bearing down,
makeshift swords ready and able,
all hands to the oars of a cast-off table;
we’d meant to take no prisoners,
but time and tide got the better of us;
heaven closed in, fired a broadside, hinting
at our mothers to call us back inside

From the window, I saw someone
rush at the children, moving them on;
‘Away! Let’s have some peace!’
(Leviathan jaws indulging on innocence.)
I slammed the window shut, angry
at being dragged thus from my reverie,
mindful that imagination’s pull has no place
among crew around a boardroom table

I had a fight on my hands that day,
to see my motion passed come what may,
sailed too close to the wind in the eyes
of those least inclined to be adventurous,
but, oh, I got the better of them all
(in spite of a broadside too close to call)
steered my prize safely to harbour, discreetly
wiping my brow with a pirate’s bandana

Copyright R. N. Taber 2011

[Note: This poem first appeared in A Way of Life, Poetry Now, 2001 and subsequently in Poetry Rivals 2012: Captured Moments, Forward Press, 2012]

 

Labels: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Sunday 20 November 2011

Ship-in-a-Bottle OR Anger Management

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Some readers might enjoy my latest YouTube video during which I read today's poem as a voice-over:

http://www.youtube.com/rogerNtaber (Ship In A Bottle)

I am a fire sign, born on the winter solstice. I have a temper when roused...

MOTHER: You must learn to control that temper of yours, son.

BOY ROGER: How?

MOTHER: Use your imagination.

So I did...and still do.

SHIP IN A BOTTLE or ANGER MANAGEMENT

I've seen a Ship in a Bottle
tossed into the sea
among waves like a range
of snowy mountains;
it was I who sent the ship
to ride out a storm
among clouds like billows
of smoke

I leapt into the frantic sea,
swam for my life,
caught up with the bottle,
boarded the ship;
no raging sea or angry sky
could touch us,
my ship and I, in our bubble
made of glass

Deaf to the wind, blinded
by the dark,
conscious only of rancid air
suffocating me...
in desperation, I lashed out
at the bubble,
smashed the glass, let the sea
have its way

Suddenly, I'm floating upon
leaves of grass
smelling of spring rain across
a range of green hills;
storm passes, sea calms down,
deposits me...
at a so-familiar shoreline
peopled with pebbles

What choice but to negotiate
broken glass,
make peace with the pebbles,
aspire to sanctuary?
Now, should dark fury grip me,
I go to a table, let ...

a Ship in a Bottle ride its back,
break me in

Copyright R. N. Taber 2010




Labels: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Thursday 10 November 2011

A Space Odyssey

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

 An earlier version of the poem was written in 2002; it appeared in a Poetry Now [Forward Press] anthology 'These Days' in 2004 and in my collection later the same year. I have since revised and reworked the original poem and changed the title.

Regular readers will know that as I prepare posts for the blog, I often find myself making minor or (as in this case) major revisions to poems where earlier versions have already been published. This is not so much a criticism of the first version as, looked at again from a distance of some years, I sometimes feel the original can be improved upon. Some people get in touch to say they prefer the original/s while others may prefer my revision/s but like both; others still, ask why I tinker with poems at all and/or why I settled for the original when it was ‘quite obviously’ the genesis for a different poem altogether. Ah, but it would not have been in the least bit obvious to me at the time I wrote it. I must have been satisfied enough to see it published. Only much later, do I sometimes find myself unhappy with what, yes, I may now see as the genesis of another poem.

As I have said many times, love takes many shapes and forms; of all these, the love of one person for another, sexual and/or platonic makes the greater contribution in mapping out the most wonderful journeys we take across time and space albeit always vulnerable to human error. As for sexuality, it but is one of love’s coordinates along with mutual understanding; it also needs to be up to the task of repudiating if not discarding any socio-cultural-religious elements that would not only point us in another direction but also see us heartsick voyagers in a nightmare.

Needless to say map reading of this particular nature is (or should be) instinctive. At the same time, we need to appreciate that one person’s natural instincts may well be another’s nemesis; if the old adage - where there’s a will, there’s a way - may not always prove to be the case, there is still a lot to be said for at least trying to push existing parameters to accommodate both.

A SPACE ODYSSEY

In the saddest twilight
known to man or woman,
find no gladder omen
than in the sigh of a wistful virgin,
left to watch birds fly
(far too high to identify)
sailing the fairest horizon,
teasing the inner eye

Oh, the beauty, mystery,
privileges and passion of voyagers
in personal space

Glimpses of Heaven,
but no word of invitation
or greater loneliness
(nor sweeter) known to humankind;
a hidden planet
where no others may go
and only those we choose
chance getting close

Identifying isolation
among starry splinters of its galaxy,
light years away

So near, yet so far,
grim mortality yet to loose
its stranglehold on us,
allowing us to breathe that more easily
among lush vegetation
of the surreal kind
than where a half dead
imagination applies

Ultimate contradiction,
conjoined isolates hell bent on pushing
parameters of space

Copyright R. N. Taber 2004; 2011

[Note The genesis of this poem (originally under the title, Time To Ourselves) can be found in 1st eds. of The Third Eye by R. N. Taber, Assembly Books, 2004]

Labels: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Tuesday 8 November 2011

Where A Monster Feeds

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

[Update (March 29 2017) Today, Theresa May triggers article 50 of the Lisbon Treaty to take the UK out of the EU. Now, I love Scotland. Why, I keep asking myself, does the SNP think it is better for Scotland to remain under the EU yoke when it would be better off having greater powers devolved to the Scottish Parliament from Westminster (as Theresa May has already implied may well happen)? As for trade, Scotland gets more revenue from trading with the UK than with the EU. Scots (who live in Scotland) whom I have spoken to don't want to see the UK break up so I can only hope that Nicola Sturgeon's obsession with  Independence continues to be seen as NOT in Scotland's best interests by the majority of  those who will be left to carry the proverbial can.]

[Update (June 24 2016): In 1975, I voted in favour of an economic union with the rest of Europe (EEC) not the political (not to mention extortionist) shambles it has become. So, yes, I am delighted that Britain has now voted to leave the EU. There are likely to be both economic and political storms ahead, and we must weather those. Hopefully, though, we will see a rainbow in the longer term, followed by more sunshine than showers. Whatever, the Remain and Brexit camps need to put their differences aside, not bear grudges, and work together; not only for the good of the country, but also of Europe as a whole. Let's not forget that Britain is a part of Europe, always has been and always will be.]

[Update (May 2016): Some readers have been in touch to ask how I feel about the forthcoming UK referendum about staying or leaving the EU. While the poem on this page makes my feelings clear at the time, these are much the same. As far as trade is concerned, EU countries need ours just as much as we need theirs. Regarding security, it is NATO keeps us safe, not the EU. Indeed EU insistence on freedom of movement puts everyone’s security at risk; it is clear the lack of border controls encourage terrorists to infiltrate genuine refugees. However, it is the fact that Turkey is likely to join the EU at some future date that is the deciding factor for me.

In February 2016, two Turkish men aged 22 and 23 who stole an ice cream and a bag of salted sunflower seeds from a classmate when they were 14 and 15 year-old schoolboys were  jailed for 13 years each after a trial lasting eight years. The incredible sentence, for robbery, was passed down by the court even though the victim had never even complained about the matter to police; it was only raised by teachers at the school in Istanbul who were hoping to scare the two boys.

I have no problem with Islam (except the homophobic attitude of many who subscribe to it although that applies to many if not most world religions) but like the rest of the civilised world, I have a problem with radical Islam. The Turkey of today is fast becoming a radical Islamic state; if and when it is admitted to the EU, I fear for the increasing spread of radical Islam Europe-wide.]

Update (June 2016): A good case for BR-EXIT can also be found on You Tube:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UTMxfAkxfQ0

Now, the banks may be mostly to blame for the credit crunch that first opened its jaws in 2008, but the real monster in the eyes of many Europeans (including myself) is the European Parliament.

The eyes of the world may well be on Greece and Italy at this moment in time, but they do not stand alone where the Economics of Power and Politics of Blame are (frequently) seen to rear their ugly heads....

Dare I suggest there is a need to tame the monster to save the Euro? In other words, there needs to be a cull of its more corrupt and/or inept elements...

This poem is a villanelle.

WHERE A MONSTER FEEDS

Eurozone, in Debt’s dark lair,
struggling to reassure the world;
Europeans, fighting despair

Crisis an ascending stair,
stability, a high risk password;
Eurozone, in Debt’s dark lair

Political in-fighting clear,
Brussels, a theatre of the absurd;
Europeans, fighting despair

Its ineptitude stripped bare,
too few voices of reason heard;
Eurozone, in Debt’s dark lair

Flushed out of devious cover,
MEPs, for jobs running scared;
Europeans, fighting despair

Even the Economics of Power
found wanting on Paradise Road;
Eurozone, in Debt’s dark lair.
Europeans, fighting despair

Copyright R. N. Taber 2011

Labels: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Sunday 30 October 2011

Time Out

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Today’s poem last appeared on the blogs in 2009 and I am repeating it today especially for a ‘L. P.’ who has been in touch to ask how best to tell family and friends he is gay. Another young man once asked when I thought might be a good time to tell his parents he had no intention of marrying the young woman his family have chosen for him. I also told them both that, it is their decision and theirs alone, but the longer they wait, the harder it will be. Nor should we blame ourselves for any hurt caused by standing out ground when we feel the need. We are not answerable for the shortcomings and/or short sightedness of others.

Is there ever a right time to tell someone something with which they may feel uncomfortable? Home truths, for example, never go down well at first if at all.

Ah, but we should not underestimate the power of common sense, and even less so the heart’s capacity to argue with questionable reason...and win.

Just as most LGBT people need to make time to tell family and friends about their sexuality, so those among the heterosexual majority who decide to go against parental well-meaning for their well-being and choose another path also need to choose their moment with care. Yes, with care, for diplomacy can only ever help win over the opposition.

In some instances, of course, there will rarely if ever be a ‘right’ time to raise this matter or that. Yet, the more serious the matter and the more intensely it concerns us, the more important it is that we make time to let the people who matter to us know that it’s the way in life we propose to follow, and are confident it is right for us.
,
Whether any attempts at diplomacy succeed or not, only time will tell ... and time demands both parties fully respect if not fully understand each other's point of view. Everyone needs to take time out in their lives to reconsider taking sides against others simply because they are 'different'; in other words, they do not conform to our own conventions/expectations. I suspect it is up to younger generations, from all walks of life, to lead the way in proving that our differences do not make us different, only human.

Did I say it was easy?

TIME OUT

Doors half opening, half closing;
windows flung wide, slammed shut;
roads stretching, bending;
children born and growing so fast;
parents coming, going,
working, and trying their hardest
to make out they won’t
even mind dying, but only so long
as the timing’s - what, right?

Earth flung, heaped, piling up;
nature’s buds opening, now closing;
dirt tracks stretching, bending;
world's birds singing while nesting;
parents coming, going,
and working at trying their hardest
to make out they won’t
even mind chicks flying off so long
as the timing’s - what, right?

More flinging, slamming about;
hungry mouths opening, now closing;
bony legs stretching, bending;
a capacity for love born, growing fast;
doubts coming, going,
working at trying their hardest
to fool us they not only
have our very best interests at heart,
but their timing’s - what, right?

Seasons of animal, vegetable, mineral,
leaving no time to make sense of it all

Copyright R. N. Taber 2005; 2011

[Note: An earlier version of this poem appears under the title 'A Question of Timing' in A Feeling for the Quickness of Time by R. N. Taber, Assembly Books, 2005.]

Labels: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Friday 28 October 2011

Hollywood Boulevard

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Many of us dream of fame and fortune, especially when we are feeling low and life is not working out too well for us. Fortunately, most of us have both feet planted firmly in terra firma and begin to mull over the down side of fame and fortune; lack of privacy, petty jealousies and one-upmanship, not forgetting critics who haven’t a creative bone in their bodies yet feel qualified to judge the creative performances of others...

Better by far to settle for the best of things on our side of the proverbial fence. Even so, a little daydreaming does no harm...

Me? I just enjoy writing poetry, as much as a form of creative therapy as an art form. I have been prone to depression since childhood, and it is no coincidence that my first published poem appeared in my school magazine when I was only 11 years-old. Writing, painting, music, gardening...any form of creative therapy that a person enjoys and can keep his or her demons at bay has to be worth the effort...doesn't it?  As for fame and fortune... a welcome by-product, of course, but far less of a priority than any pleasure and personal satisfaction, especially when the shared by others, and making a difference. I don't expect anyone to like everything I write, but I so love it when readers get in touch to say that reading a poem of mine - in either of my poetry blogs, general or gay-interest - has helped motivate them to improving their quality of life.

HOLLYWOOD BOULEVARD

Walked with Fame one afternoon, watery sun
and a misty rain;
man, woman, couldn’t tell - Humphrey Bogart
or Lauren Bacall?
Better than any movie, the suspense
was really getting to me,
and where would I be by the end of the day?
(Good question...)

Strained to hear what my companion
had to say about it, though abysmally scripted;
caught words like fate, jealousy, love, hate,
sounding as trite as Mother’s plastic mac worn
to fend off a heavy summer storm;
only, no storm broke nor did any ghost
call me out, settling for thinly disguised threats
and nagging innuendo

Should I take the bait? Oh, I thought I might,
but - no!
Rather, I quickened my step, widening the gap
between us,
hardly able to see hand in front of face
for tears,
a now glaring sun hastening to dispel mist, rain,
and human anxieties

Copyright R. N. Taber2005; 2009



[Note: An earlier version of this poem appears in 1st eds. of A Feeling For The Quickness Of Time by R. N. Taber, Assembly Books 2005; 2nd ed. in preparation].

Labels: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,